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All Welcome Loneliness is a disease{M}
read at your own discretion







HyoSonn
Female
Coalition Companion
Cheetah
© Raton
3.75 years
Height: 32in
Posts: 61
AP: 6AP
Linked Accounts

Weight: 63lbs

Loneliness is a disease{M}

(This post was last modified: 11-20-2020, 08:09 PM by HyoSonn. Edited 1 time in total.)
Hyosunn
"quote



Loneliness is a disease. It strikes quickly and rather cruelly. It can send someone that believes they are fine, believes that they do not need another to survive, head long into a pit of utter darkness. It attacks at the inner most core of ones being so at first they truly believe that they are okay, that they are fine, that the do not need another soul. Slowly it starts to build until an inner voice starts to hiss and whisper that you will never be loved, that you are worthless, that you are scum and slowly you begin to believe it until you firmly believe that you are to be alone for the eternity of your life, destined to be over looked and sneered at. Your heart begins to ache a terrible ache that can be relived by nothing, not even the company of another. You tell yourself and others that you are okay and smile to prove it but deep down you know better.

It is not long before numbness sets in. This was how Hyo Sonn was feeling. At the beginning of her life without her mother she had 'seen' some advantages to life. She believed that she could do something with her life but over time the woman realized that she couldn't do anything. Her mother had made sure of that. Unsure of what to do or how to fix the life that her mother had left for her the woman set out from her home and traveled North. She wasn't depressed, only discouraged. She didn't speak a lick of the language that was common around this world. She felt stupid for not being able to do it, she felt useless for the first time in her life because she was blind. But, since she was alone she wanted to be alone. Her thoughts were to travel away from the Coalition - leave the realm and not come back.

Who would miss her there? The answer was one she knew all to well. There was no one that would ask where she was, there was one one to look for her. She knew that and accepted it and so that was why she was leaving.

The woman traveled slowly but her steps were determined. Why should she stay in a place like that? Couldn't she find a better place? Perhaps. She had every intention on searching for a place that she could better herself but where exactly was that?

The sightless woman traveled for a long time. She could feel the day changing to night, the sun fading away and removing what warmth the sun had to offer only to be replaced by the cold moon. She was sure of her steps, she had been blind since birth and relied heavily on her sense of smell and her hearing. The sounds are what guided her.

Her awkward shuffles every so often kept her from tripping and soon she was able to walk with the grace that she was taught. Her head was held high and her ears perked and listening for any new sounds that might mean danger or, perhaps, something interesting. As she moved forwards the sound of water graced her ears and she smiled "water..." she said the word quietly to herself, it was an English word that she had learned from Inga. -Whatever happened to her dear friend? Life probably kept her from getting out and the fact that they lived in separate realms had a lot to do with it too.

Quickening her pace a bit she sound found her feet touching dampened grass, the roaring of the water was louder now.. She was close to the water. She paused and lowering her muzzle towards the grass she breathed in deeply and smiled. It was a lovely smell, a soothing smell. A quiet sigh escaped her. It was peaceful here, perhaps she would meet someone and here or find a realm nearby that would take her in.

Was she daft? She could offer nothing. She could not hunt, speak a language besides her own, she could not see or fight for others. Nope, completely useless. Frustration gnawed at her stomach, it was irritating that she could do nothing. Her mother had ruined it all. Ruined her chances of having a normal life by refusing to teach her anything or help her to become normal. For the first time she felt hatred towards her mother, she felt bitterness and scorn. She wanted a different life, she didn't care if she was blind. She only wanted to be of use, to know how to do something - even if that was to speak the common tongue.

Beginning again, the woman walked forwards. Forgetting to check her steps, her front left paw hit against a stone - tripping her and throwing her headlong into the bubbling water. She let out a yelp of fear as she went in and surfaced with a gasp for air. Her paws flailed violently as she tried to swim back to shore unaware that she was only moving herself further into the water. The current grabbed hold and jerked her hither and thither and pulling her under. Each time she would surface, gasping for air - her movements growing weaker and weaker each time. Coughing and sputtering, she made one last attempt to swim but was once more overtaken by the current and was pulled under the water once more.


"speak"

Stock



-exit via death if not saved.





Hyo Sonn is blind.
She also speaks mainly Korean, her English is rather poor and she can only understand bits and pieces.
Hyo Sonn has a Southern flying squirrel spirima named Geum Bi.


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